Losing Weight, Wait Forever

Oh yes, I used to be skinny. It wasn’t a choice but rather a way of life. I grew up knowing how scarce food can be. During college, I would eat only twice a day to save some money for school projects or books. How I loved the smell of new books. I despised having to photocopy them; apart from it being illegal, the texts are obscured. But of course, in the economy of a student, photocopy is sometimes better than a failing exam scores.

I am not saying that I became rich after graduation but I can now eat more than twice a day. I did not gain that much weight back then but I gained nevertheless. After getting married and giving birth I somehow gained more than enough to worry myself on a bikini. My legs are twice as big and my ass looks fat. I had problems recovering from that. I tried restricting my food intake but for each delicious meal I imagine the end of the world and regretting not eating the food that I love. So diet is no good. I tried getting in shape by dancing again but my stomach is always full and my body is way too heavy to move. I am lazy most often than not and soon ignored my weight.

I am trying Yoga now to ease my mind. I am not sure if I want to get back into shape, I sure dreamt of my old body but food is just irresistible.

So, I’ll just wait for me to realize that I’d probably die early due to my unhealthy lifestyle and that having to leave my daughter behind a little too young is such a dreadful thought that I’d start making changes with my food intake, and finally exercise or Yoga much more often.

 

Frustrated Mermaid

Frustrated Mermaid

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