I am trying to juggle 2 online jobs, motherhood, being a wife, a supportive sister and a loving aunt while forming my thoughts on a pizza parlor endeavor. Two days ago I said yes to host a kiddie party next month. I think this event organizing will be my step towards my cupcake business, and I am thrilled.
I have always doubted myself. Most of the time fear eats my courage before I can act on them. My decision to move my foot a step closer to the life I want is beginning to give me more energy. I think this energy is called purpose and I think purpose is good. Last night I browsed through Pinterest for ideas on loot bags and maybe some photo backdrop. These are after all kids and they want to have fun. I have great games in mind but I still research for more. More ideas are good.
Forming the business that I wanted in my mind is inspiring and scary. I am not sure if I am ready to take the risk. I am also not sure if I am a going to be good in business. But then as I shared that endeavor with other people, thoughts became plans and now it’s up for me to convert those plans into action. Life is full of risk, anyway. I say take them. It’s all I got. Life is unfolding right before my eyes and I was too scared to say Yes. Fridays are now my counseling days. An hour to spend with someone in need of your listening and your guidance is a good de-stressing event, and I said yes to that too!
A week ago, I cried to my friend as I told her I no longer understand where my life is headed. I want to do whatever it is that would make each waking moment exciting, fun and meaningful. To live intently. Me and my husband are trying to make both ends meet and we are not satisfied so far. The game changer is that, we have no spare to give to every person that needs help while we try to make our dreams come true, such as building our own house. We can’t run away from our dreams forever. We have to do something.
Yes, I still have 3 events to plan and organize. I have one in September (this one is more of a fun work), another would be to help a cousin for her daughter’s birthday, I have a children’s party to plan for December, and a reunion next year. I think that’s a total of 4? I am not even good at counting! Whoa! There are still loads of preparations to make. I am trying to figure them out as I go along. I said yes to every little thing that makes me happy. Yes, that’s what I call life.
count.steps.forward 
Once in a while I feel the same way like you do, Sis. Lost. They call it quarter life crisis (since we are not yet in our midlife. :D) We question if we are on the right track or heading somewhere meaningful. It’s natural I guess, part of our self-assessment process. Women tend to over think though when in fact we are just doing fine if not great.
It’s good that you’re keeping yourself preoccupied even with things you’re uncertain but passionate about. There’s no sure ball in anything anyway so yeah go ahead and say yes. 😉
I can’t say much about helping others while you’re also struggling because I’m also in the same boat with you. Hahaha!
That’s why I think it’s good to sate our passion. It fuels us to keep going on life’s harsh realities even if we’re at our wit’s end. 🙂
I totally agree! 🙂
Especially living in the province where I have relatives who don’t have anything to eat when I have enough. It’s not bad to share a bit I guess. They’re also not expecting a lot. 🙂
Thanks, Sis! 😉
Hi Mona!
I can’t help but read through your post.
I know generosity is a sexy value. It is also important to know when not to let people take advantage of your time. Please say “No”, too. It’s less stressful that way.
Stream line your business so that it won’t feel too much for you to handle. Take it one business project at a time. A Cupcake business is good. Stick to it. More power to you! I always knew you are far braver than you think you already are.
“I cried..I no longer understand where my life is headed.” I feel the same way. But when I really think about it, in depth, to be humble, to live simply, to continue doing something, any semblance of paid work, then it’s enough. As long as you are living. That’s a purpose.
You can only do so much, Mona. There’s this serenity prayer my Granny always shares with us that I’m sure you know as well, ” God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.”
Take care you! Please know that you are an amazing person!
Thank you, Audrey. I agree with you on that, and yes having to say no is kind of frustrating which I have also dealt with-hopefully with poise and grace. But I cannot just rest from there. Saying no has not been an issue to me but when it comes to life and death situation, saying no can be very difficult to do.
My business venture is still skeletal. There are many things to consider with cupcake business, too. In the province, the market can be very tough since people focuses on the need and not the want. Market wise, it is not feasible yet. And there are sacrifices that I cannot make especially with the time that needed to be spent on this. But I am hopeful that my days will be filled with clarity and sense of optimism that slowly it’s all coming together.
My vision of the world is too great, and I want to test my limits. I am happy that I am surrounded with people who can be tough when I am not. And honest enough to tell me what I need to know. Just like you. 🙂
I really appreciate this, Audz and I wish the best in your endeavors, too! Glad to know you! Take good care wherever you go.
❤